INTEGRITY

About a year ago I had someone challenge my integrity. I didn’t realise at the time why I was so angry, I just put it down to their ignorance.

I was telling my CML story & their response was “a dr told me CML is just like diabetes”. This dr worked in a nursing home and no doubt chronic myloide leakeamia when diagnosed at 70 yrs of age is like diabetes because it has about a 10 yr life span before it kills you. Even my heomotologist told me that! I guess this person missed the fact I was diagnosed at 22, didn’t care, or was having a bad hair day too preoccupied to pay attention to what I was saying. I’ve kicked my self a million times for not addressing it then & there & never liked her since. And when I reflect now, although still angry I realise it’s because she was questioning the drama, minimizing my suffering, doubting my struggle, discrediting my life & death situation – challenging my integrity.

I’m ashamed & afraid to say on the weekend I did the same to a good friend. Not has hideously ignorant or bluntly rude, for it was in jest but I do realise that perhaps the timing was off and I was insensitive what ever way u look at it. So for that I’m truly sorry.

When u question someone’s integrity it goes to the heart of who we really believe we are, our values, our intent in our actions, our ability to truly be authentic and to admit when we are wrong.

Happy days xx

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